Welcome back! A few more jokes...

1. I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?"
She said if she told me it would defeat the purpose.

2. What if there were no hypothetical questions?

3. If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, could it be considered a hostage situation?

4. Is there another word for synonym?

5. What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?

6. If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?

7. Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?

8. If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?

9. Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?

10. If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

11. How do they get deer to cross the road only at those yellow road signs?

12. One nice thing about egotists: they don't talk about other people.

13. How is it possible to have a civil war?

14. If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?

15. Can an atheist get insurance against acts of God?

Fact: people who smile more live longer!